When you drive along the Summit Road please thank all the idiots of Christchurch for being able to park on such nice carparks along the road. Those carparks have been altered attractively because car hoons had used the old style ones for races and burnouts. Oh, and also thank me, please. As ratepayers we have paid for the new look.
As you might know, I have a liking for guys who compensate the facts of having small dicks and even smaller brains by driving noisy cars with huge exhausts. And fat girls who do not get attention in their daily lives.
The old carparks in the Port Hills were just tar-sealed lay-bys which at night became nice meeting places for spinning wheels. So the first step to stop this nuisance was to plough the carparks and transform them into a kind of potato fields, so you had to drive slowly around them on the edges and could not use the centre. The burnouts stopped immediately. Step two was to redesign the space, and now you find the carparks sealed again, with big rocks sitting in bark-covered plant beds.
If you walk or cycle on the tracks of the Port Hills you might sometimes spot big metal slabs reflecting in the sunlight. Most of them are also reminders of the hoons. When they had done enough racing they burnt the often stolen cars and rolled them down the slopes from the Summit Road. There they keep on lying in the tussock grass – some of them next to washing machines that have been dumped by other people. As the terrain is steep obviously nobody bothers to clean up this mess. I suggest convicted hoons be sent to the Port Hills, demount the scrap and carry it down the hills piece by piece. By doing this they could bring some sense into their senseless lives.
They are no car lovers. If they were they would not terrorise other people, throw beer bottles in their properties, threaten those people and make them frightened prisoners in their own homes, fire skyrockets into wildlife parks (as happened at Orana Park), and throw bottles and stones at police officers.
Driving is all on the left-hand side of the road. You cannot turn right on a red light (as in the States), you must stop and wait for the green light.
The speed limit on the open road is 100km and in built up areas 50km. Seat belts must be worn at all times.
Beware! on country roads, don't drive too fast as you may turn a corner and encounter this scene in front of you. Have some patience and just enjoy NZ's 'little treasures' :-)