Skegness Travel Guide

  • Main street with clock tower at the (shore) end
    Main street with clock tower at the...
    by joanj
  • Tower Gardens
    Tower Gardens
    by joanj
  • The Jolly Fisherman
    The Jolly Fisherman
    by joanj

Skegness Things to Do

  • Whose a pretty boy then ?

    The National Parrot Sanctuary has just opened recently, south of Skegness.The entrance price of 4 pounds 60p does seem a little steep - but their aim of caring for abandoned parrots is quite admirable.If your into parrots then I'm sure it is a very enjoyable place to visit. The Website looks good, but I will check it out in real life in the next...

  • Skegness pier

    There are about 50 piers left in the UK. Although not a uniquely British phenomenon, they do seem to symbolise the British Seaside. The pier at Skegness would orginally have been quite impressive, a good length you might say. It was mainly used to board pleasure steamers to Hunstanton and other Norfolk destinations. It was already unsafe from...

  • Jolly fisherman - again

    The principle statue of the town's mascot stands behind the clocktower, right on the front, surrounded by his own little fountain.From a distance, as he prances alomg with arms outstretched, he looks just a little on the 'gay' side. Of course that is in the true 1930's meaning of the word. He is overwhelmingly happy - unlike his altar ego,...

  • The Jolly fisherman goes on holiday...

    The introduction page to Skegness gives you the full rundown on one of the oldest mascots in the business. I only recently found out that a rather excellent second bronze statue of the happy chappy is placed in Skegness station. This could be the only possible reason for going onto the station. The station is quite a disgusting rotting mess, and...

  • Home of legless lizards

    When Sourbugger is usually talking about 'birds' in Skegness, it is normally of the mini-skirted variety (an abiding long term interest) rather than the feathered kind.Gibraltar point, as any 'twitcher' (bird spotter) will tell you is of national imprtance for lapwings and many other species of birds.Just a couple of miles out of town on the coast...

  • The delights of Northern cuisine...

    Tony's Fish & Chips is situated in a prime spot on the front at Skegness. There maybe a canopy and outside seats, but unlike some upmarket mediterranean resorts with their posh cafes and tavernas, the canopy is to keep off the rain and the seats are moulded from recycled from old Trabants.The main clientelle are of course lardy-arsed northerners,...

  • Large mammals

    You could go to Skegness and see many examples of large and slippery mammals with whiskers who smell of fish and make strange croaking noises when approached.But less about life in the nightclubs - the natureland / seal sanctuary is very good at what it does for just over a fiver with seals (obviously) penguins, an aquarium and a tropical house....

  • Meet the happiest man in Skegness

    Here's a little task for you if you ever visit Skegness. See if you can find this plastic gingerbread man. He certainly needs a good scrub, much like the rest of the place.One little clue, you will find him quite close to the prancing Fisherman who find Skegness so bracing !He's certainly no sourbugger - I think I will use him as my picture on my...

  • Skegness's roundabout

    It doesn't exactly compare to the Eiffel tower,Big Ben, the Trevi fountain or even Blackpool's tower.This pidley little clocktower stands on the central roundabout in Skeggers, where the promenade road turns into the main shopping street.Still if you have seen it, you know you have been to Skegness. It is said that if you look at the clock once and...


Skegness Hotels

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Skegness Restaurants

  • Free heart attacks

    There are a number of high class establishments in Skegness that take the finest chipping potatoes, lightly fry them in the finest oils and serve them with relish and cheery smile.You didn't really believe that did you?Lots of places sell the most disgusting grease covered conglomorations your stomach will ever meet. Chips when your drunk -...

  • An oasis of good taste

    The Aroma Coffeehouse on the main road in Skegness serves good quality coffee and Paninis and the like. The decor is relatively plush, with bits of americana and Hollywood type bits and pieces.It's certainly an oasis of tranquility when compared to the myriad of chip joints that litter the town - including the infamous 'chip pan alley'.

  • Skegness Hotels

    29 Hotels in Skegness

Skegness Nightlife

  • Rocking on the rails

    The rail line from Grantham to Skeggy is now being run as a 'community railway'.A recent intiative (as March 06) is to run some special 'themed' services on about a monthly basis.The first one will feature the Celtic group 'The band from County Hell', leaving Grantham for Skegness at 6.35 PM (some of the more elderly UK readers may get the little...

  • You thought you had left 1978

    You though that 1978 was a long time ago - but No!, any act that last had a decent non-ironic television appearance since 1978 is here for your delectation on stage.You just couln't make this stuff up : the summer season at the Embassy Theatre last year (2003) included the following performers still pathetically scatching a living out of people who...

  • Boozing On The Boardwalk

    First hour of our arrival here, and after a long drive here we decieded we deserved a well earned drink, so here I am with half a lager !


Skegness Transportation

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    by sourbugger Updated Sep 15, 2003

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    If ever you arrive in Skegness the best thing you can do is turn around and head home. Clearly you must have arrived by accident and fallen asleep on the train.

    Central trains lay on an appauling service to this place for a laugh. They buy cast-offs from Albanian railways, paint them a lurid green colour and then have the cheek to charge you.

    The alternatives are even worse - the A52 is the worst A-road in Christendom, save for that one on the edge of the Lake District (A55 is it ?)

    The picture below gives you the best view of Skegg - back down the line towards the rest of the world.

    i'm a tourist - get me out of here

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Skegness Shopping

  • Largest market in Europe (so they claim)

    The claim may be that this is the largest market in Europe, but you must remember that they also add the words 'seven days'.There must, therefore be many markets that are much larger than this rambling collection of odd 'n' sods, but don't go out on the 'flog' everyday. Same complete C**P that you will find all over Skegness. It's just here that...

  • it won't cost you much - a quid

    Skegness must have the world's highest concentration of pound shops :i.e "Don't ask the price - everything's a pond, Duck".It makes you ponder where they source this stuff from. Who I wonder in some mad fit of over enthusiam decided to triple an order for pink bogbrushes in the shape of cat, and then found that they didn't sell too well.At least...

  • Best shop in Skeggie

    No doubt - this is the finest store in Skegness, it's wide aisles are filled with peasants and the shelves with products of all countries. Baked beans - 9p


Skegness Local Customs

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    by sourbugger Updated Jun 9, 2003

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    It is very common to be referred to as a Duck in the East Midlands and Lincolnshire.

    If someone is in their 50's or over it sounds quite quaint, but when a youngster says "Thanks Duck" it does sound a little odd.

    Listen out for it.

    P.S If you really are a duck, I'm not sure what the ettiquette is.

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Skegness Warnings and Dangers

  • Cross my palm with silver, dearie

    Whilst it may be seen as some as a piece of harmless fun on a seaside jolly, to others it is dabbling in the the dark arts that should not concern us mere mortals...What is Sourbugger blithering on about ? Having your palm read by some wizened old crone comes under my defintion of a warning or danger. What makes some sane, sensible person to throw...

  • Be may just have a taste...

    Buying things that are in bad taste is the very essence of seaside resorts like Skeggy.Caputured here in a shop that is supposed to be a pirates cave or smugglers den I found a garden ornament in quite equisite poor taste.Just how would this look in rosebed ? Would it impress the mother-in-law ? I think not.

  • Tidal Currents

    It may not be Surf here but its a definate no, no not to be wandering on the beach when the tide is slowly coming in, as you can so easily get surrounded, and when this happens its panic stations gallore. I did it many years ago, stood watching the sea, a man shouted me and I looked round to see what he wanted and he was telling me that I had been...


Skegness What to Pack

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    by sourbugger Updated Jul 14, 2004

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    Luggage and bags: It is important to use the correct matching set of luggage when you head out to Skegness on your Holidays.

    Some people will get it all wrong by using plastic carrier bags from such stores as Safeway, Marks & Spencers, Waitrose or Next. Worse still they might even mix & Match.

    I would advise that you stick to tried and tested brands like Tesco's or Morrisons. If you wish to mark yourself out as a real skank then matching refuse sacks or poundstrecher bags are a good idea.

    Clothing/Shoes/Weather Gear: The very best trainers money can buy.

    Six inch high stilletto's it pink / yellow / Turquoise.

    T-shirt with offensive slogan on it.
    (E.g I won't but fcuk ing designer gear, Adihash ? )

    Toiletries and Medical Supplies: Plenty of Brut for the men and Yardley for the Ladies

    Photo Equipment: Disposable cameras for photographing of fat slappers from Sheffield on hen nights with heaving bosoms dressed as schoolgirls / nurses / cheerleaders / traffic wardens

    Camping/Beach/Outdoor Gear: Camping not allowed. On the welcome sign to Skegg it says "Welcome to Skegness - no puffs"

    Outdoor gear is the same as indoor gear if you are talking about clothes, but if you want real outdoor 'gear' then feel free to talk to the many interesting businessmen who can furish you with substances from the four corners of Afganistan.

    His 'n' hers Matching luggage
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Skegness Sports & Outdoors

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    by sourbugger Updated Apr 4, 2011

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    Crazy golf is an important sport - surely we should be pushing for olympic recognition of this skillful sport. We should pick up gold medals as the sport as the one attribute vital for British success -- you need absolutely no athletic prowess whatsoever.

    It's a liitle fact that many of the golfing greats perfect their putting here off season when they can get a discount.

    Gary Player has been known to curse at the spinning windmill and Lee Trevino made his Masters victories possible by repeatedly putting past the giant penguin on hole 10.

    If only Tiger woods would see sense and hone his skills between the gnomes on the back 9 then total domination of the world golfing circuit would be assured.

    Who needs Augustua ?
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    • Family Travel

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Skegness Favorites

  • Home of "The Beatles" - not many people...

    It is a rather amazing fact that you can sensibly claim that the Beatles were first formed in Skegness !In 1962, Ringo Starr and his group Rory Storm and the Hurricanes, arrived to play the summer season at Skegness after two successful years at Pwllheli. During that summer John Lennon and Paul McCartney visited the Skegness camp and met with Ringo...

  • A Dip In The Pool

    One of the funniest things that I saw when I was in Skegness was in the outdoor swimming pool at Butlins Holiday Camp. We had all been out drinking and then decided to go for a dip in the pool after the bars had shut. Off came most of our clothes and in we dived, we were having a great time until one of the Redcoats arrived back on camp after a...

  • Memories of tourism in the 1930's

    I recently came across a part of a website, that gave a very personal insight into tourism in Skegness during the 1930's.It somehow seemed a lot more fun than it is nowadays !Go to then click on History and memories 1930-1939


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Map of Skegness

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