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Family filled entertainment, fun, fun, bars and lots of!!!
Very busy in the peak season with limited parking (get there before 9am or miss out).
In a nutshell
Skegness, bracing back in time!!!
If ever you arrive in Skegness the best thing you can do is turn around and head home. Clearly you must have arrived by accident and fallen asleep on the train.
Central trains lay on an appauling service to this place for a laugh. They buy cast-offs from Albanian railways, paint them a lurid green colour and then have the cheek to charge you.
The alternatives are even worse - the A52 is the worst A-road in Christendom, save for that one on the edge of the Lake District (A55 is it ?)
The picture below gives you the best view of Skegg - back down the line towards the rest of the world.
Updated Sep 15, 2003
It is very common to be referred to as a Duck in the East Midlands and Lincolnshire.
If someone is in their 50's or over it sounds quite quaint, but when a youngster says "Thanks Duck" it does sound a little odd.
Listen out for it.
P.S If you really are a duck, I'm not sure what the ettiquette is.
Updated Jun 9, 2003
Luggage and bags: It is important to use the correct matching set of luggage when you head out to Skegness on your Holidays.
Some people will get it all wrong by using plastic carrier bags from such stores as Safeway, Marks & Spencers, Waitrose or Next. Worse still they might even mix & Match.
I would advise that you stick to tried and tested brands like Tesco's or Morrisons. If you wish to mark yourself out as a real skank then matching refuse sacks or poundstrecher bags are a good idea.
Clothing/Shoes/Weather Gear: The very best trainers money can buy.
Six inch high stilletto's it pink / yellow / Turquoise.
T-shirt with offensive slogan on it.
(E.g I won't but fcuk ing designer gear, Adihash ? )
Toiletries and Medical Supplies: Plenty of Brut for the men and Yardley for the Ladies
Photo Equipment: Disposable cameras for photographing of fat slappers from Sheffield on hen nights with heaving bosoms dressed as schoolgirls / nurses / cheerleaders / traffic wardens
Camping/Beach/Outdoor Gear: Camping not allowed. On the welcome sign to Skegg it says "Welcome to Skegness - no puffs"
Outdoor gear is the same as indoor gear if you are talking about clothes, but if you want real outdoor 'gear' then feel free to talk to the many interesting businessmen who can furish you with substances from the four corners of Afganistan.
Updated Jul 14, 2004
Crazy golf is an important sport - surely we should be pushing for olympic recognition of this skillful sport. We should pick up gold medals as the sport as the one attribute vital for British success -- you need absolutely no athletic prowess whatsoever.
It's a liitle fact that many of the golfing greats perfect their putting here off season when they can get a discount.
Gary Player has been known to curse at the spinning windmill and Lee Trevino made his Masters victories possible by repeatedly putting past the giant penguin on hole 10.
If only Tiger woods would see sense and hone his skills between the gnomes on the back 9 then total domination of the world golfing circuit would be assured.
Updated Apr 4, 2011
Address: Jolly roger Crazy golf