Circus Circus Buffet, Las Vegas

Fuming about this hole...

Wouldn't normally bother writing about a bad restaurant, but this place got me furious. Mostly 'cos my bible of American eateries, Zagat, had praised the place so highly. (Along with nearly every other critics guide that kissed butt on the proudly displayed certificates).

Reserved a lunch through the ever fabulous opentable.com.

When we arrived there was already a queue out of the door with people who hadn't booked... "suckers" I thought as we strolled past.

Sure enough our name was down, but we were asked to wait in the bar area whilst they prepared the table. And we waited. And waited. And they've got a funny idea of time in this place as I kept getting told "2 minutes".

And waited.

After sitting for 45mins in the stinky dark pit that is Circus Circus, The Steakhouse, we were finally ushered to our table by an apologetic waiter (no doubt worried his 20% tip was evaporating).

Now it got a little weird at this point. Basically you don't order food, but go up to a buffet and heap food onto your own plate. Unfortunately it was all a little "school dinner" for my liking. Everything was soggy, steamed beyond recognition, and had turned a funny grey hue - may have been the lighting. At the end of this sorry parade was a pitiful excuse for a carvery which consisted of a leg of ham (looked & tasted reconditioned, even though it wasn't) and rib-eye beef, which was haemorrhaging blood, surrounded by an inch thick layer of blubber fat, mmm, delicious...

The steak - remember this is called Steakhouse - comes as a second course. You have the choice of about 3 types. We went fillet and got something the size of my big toe. Fortunately, it tasted just as good.

Definitely the oysters from the first course. Shrivelled dry and tasting like an old used condom... probably. Had an unusual after-taste that left us feeling sick for the rest of the day.

On the plus side, they try to drown you in mediocre champagne (included) throughout the meal, so if you do go, just make the most of that. They even forced 2 beakers of it into our hands as we stood up to leave.

Everyone who works here is an incompetent fool, from the waddling receptionist, over excitable waiter, pointless maitre d' (who meanders aimlessly around the restaurant), to the chef who shouldn't even be in charge of spooning dog food.

The barman didn't understand me when I asked for a beer. Had to ask 3 times, before spelling the word B..E..E..R.. Even then he looked clueless, before the penny finally dropped, and he repeated "Oh beeeeerr".

Would have thought he was joking, were it not for the fact this was the 16th time on the holiday we had experienced a serious "communication malfunction".

The greatest steakhouse in Las Vegas... if it's your first meal after a 25 year stretch in an Iranian prison.

This place seriously dented our image of perfect American eateries (and service).

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Circus Circus Buffet, Las Vegas

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